Score: 8

"Interesting."

submission: The Facebook Game

date: August 20, 2009

But apparently, retards thrive on newgrounds, so let me explain the point. The point is to show that the life of a faceoboker is very simple, and like with most games, the player expects to die when they run out of life, however, you don't. The point is that she doesn't die, and she can have a life without facebook.

Score: 7

"This is NOT racist."

submission: Hart's Valentine II

date: July 20, 2009

It's just making fun of all the crap in a boxing movie. XD

Score: 5

"Canobie Lake!"

submission: Hart's Valentine

date: July 20, 2009

I've been there 8DD

But the flash is kinda.....Ordinary.

Score: 6

"It's ok..."

submission: Zombies - The Beginning

date: July 20, 2009

It has a lot of flaws, and I really would prefer a sequel that's more like a good Horror point and click. No offense. I did like the overall atmosphere, but there really wasn't much to do besides click and progress the story. And don't get me started on the whole, " 15 Seconds to Live" part. I couldn't see the key inside the glove compartment, and I had no idea where to put it. Also, the FPS part was very tacked on, and felt like it was kind of unnecessary. I would prefer more quicktime and point and click. It is a fair effort, though, so I'll give it 6 stars.

Score: 9

"Greatest Joke ever."

submission: Free Will - The Game

date: July 2, 2009

All you idiots should fully finish a game before actually reviewing it. All your reviews are missing the point. Totally.

Score: 10

"Great for its statement, not its gameplay."

submission: D-Day Defender

date: June 18, 2009

This game is great. It is a masterpiece. It's not here to give you great gameplay, it's here to say something. Not every war is made up of good guys and bad guys, and not every war has a dark side and light side. You play a a simple german soldier, staving off the Allied invasion. Instead of actual detailed figures, the author places the enemies as dark shapes. This is again, fitting with the message. You can't think of the dark shapes aren't human, and if you don't kill them, they'll kill you. What I really liked was how the music started playing as you were about to die. It was very touching, but I would have hoped that the health powerups be emitted in favor of just more overall HP, as having the music play about 5 times throughout a battle can remove the touching element to it. I would take this over Call of Duty or Medal of Honor anyday. This actually has something behind it, and everything is symbolic. Contrary to popular opinion, I thought the cinematics during gameplay were nice, and fit in well. This wasn't much of a game, but more an interactive movie. In a game, there is an ending, but you can choose when that ending comes. In this game, the waves get very steep, very fast. You know you will lose, and you will probably anticipate it when it happens. The little cutscenes and the music just add to this. 10 Stars.

Score: 9

"Ok."

submission: SHIFT 2

date: May 8, 2009

Let's clear this up once and for all; THIS IS A FUCKING CONTINUITY OF THE FIRST GAME. YOU START AT WHAT SEEMS TO BE THE LAST LEVEL. KEEP PLAYING INSTEAD OF WRITING DUMB REVIEWS.

Score: 9

"Oh."

submission: Don't Look Back

date: March 21, 2009

This mirrors the Greek tale of Opheus, who went to save Eurydice from the Greek God of the underworld, Hades. Hades agreed that she may go, as long as Orpheus never looked back to see her before they got out, and in the end looked back, just as they were nearly out. Eurydice then was forced to live with Hades forever. Just a bit of background on the base. XD

Score: 10

"Simply the best puzzle artist out there."

submission: Exploit

date: March 15, 2009

All of your games are deep, fun, and memorable. This one was a bit harder than your earlier submissions, but I loved it all the same. 10 Stars.

Score: 9

"Awesome."

submission: Tankmen Infinity

date: February 8, 2009

"Fuck You, Fuck You, Fuck You, you're hot, Fuck you, Fuck You, etc. " XDDDD
On par with the normal series.